Mardi Gras

What a wonderful few days I have just experienced! I left in a snow storm and arrived in the middle of a Mardi Gras parade. That was the synopsis of my Friday departure from Lubbock and arrival in New Orleans. I was meeting my college roommates for a reunion which took ten years in the making. To say I was excited was an understatement. To say that I was a little nervous, a truism. Not that I had anything specifically to fear, but with ten years in which I had not visited or spoken to the majority of the group, I feared that I might have changed and had little in common with many of my past friends. I knew walking in that I had vastly different views in the political arena and that even my "geography" was long from the day to day that most of them share. I knew that I felt good about where I am and where I am heading, but did not know if that was going to be accepted or rejected as something too far removed from their experience for actual acceptance.

My fears were put to rest when I arrived. I was the last to arrive and joined into the activities. They were so kind in waiting for me and made me feel at home immediately. I know that I am different, but I felt at ease with them and in so many ways, the years had dissolved as the conversation progressed. I watched us all fall into old relationships and patterns that we shared during our four years together in college. It was fun to immediately assume that old "furry blanket" and there was a certain degree of comfort to be had in revisiting the trust that we all had with one another.

I think of myself as I was then and as I am now and wonder that I could have ever been who I was. As I looked at each of my roommates, I was struck by their strength of conviction and their absolutes in the judgements they made. They exuded a confidence and I admired them for it. I, on the other hand, have found that the older I get, the less I am inclined to judge or make absolutes about anything. Is that being "wishy-washy" or is that being somewhat jaded by experience? I don't know. I just know that I did much listening, tried to tell stories that only included the good, bad, and ugly as it pertained to me, and open my heart to all the new experiences that I had at that time. Sometimes I became somewhat confused but for the most part, I just decided to "live for the moment" and to thoroughly enjoy this new experience.

I loved sharing the days with all the new individuals that I met. I so enjoyed immersing myself in the Nola feeling of Mardi Gras and would try to look through the eyes of my fellow parade watchers. I loved meeting my roommate's children and enjoying them as adults. What fun to visit with their friends and "talk football." I actually enjoyed talking about it and realized that I probably have become somewhat of a football fan (although I profess the opposite as often as I can!). I loved the smells and the delicious aromas of the city. The sounds and laughter were intoxicating! And I tried to fulfill the commitment that I have made to myself that I will always listen and learn from each new experience.

As I was leaving, I picked up the Picayunne Times and read about the history of the parades and the various Krewes. It was utterly fascinating as I have been "living" it with the debutante balls in Montgomery for the past thirty six years! I thoroughly enjoyed seeing the list of royalty in each Krewe and the names of the debutantes for each group. I now feel as if I have learned some new factoids.

In my conversations, I also loved hearing the rhythm of the speech of the city. I so love the south! It is musical in so many ways and has a rhythm of living that I have found to be one that suits my soul. The Big Easy is a good description for the city and it is this esprit that I wish to incorporate into my own day to day. For the most part, I live with that motto -- nothing is so very important that you lose sight of the goal of your mission. Keeping it simple, keeping it cool, and keeping the adage that "all I can control is myself" in your mantra is the only way to take advantage of the serenity that skirts us at every turn. With each passing year, I want that serenity and find that as I age, I have become so much more forgiving of myself! I am not a person who is moderate -- I am a marathon runner for God sakes! I am an exerciser-- I am a neatnik -- I am a disciplined person who loves order and scheduling in my life. But, I am also one who loves to honor those "escapes" in our life and when I am on the road, so to speak, I take full advantage of "living the experience."

All in all, this was a weekend where I "laissez les bon temps roule!" Not good french but majorly good fun!

A state of Serenity

I once wrote a letter to my aunt in which I described a moment in time. I was sitting on my back patio one afternoon, many years ago, and realized that at that moment in time, all of my children were happy. All the daily trials and worries were, for that moment, a thing of the past. My husband was enjoying his day, and all was "right in my world." I decided to write to her and in this way, preserve this realization. I wanted to make sure that when all the madness returned, I had preserved this feeling of euphoria. In this way, I felt that I was acknowledging that the happiness I had been given was worthy of recognition and of thanks.

My aunt wrote back within the week and in her most eloquent fashion, described my feeling as that of the "serenity we all seek in this life." What a wonderful way of concisely putting all my random thoughts into one simple statement. I was so inspired by this letter that I vowed to take an assessment of my life and the gifts that I receive on a more regular basis. For I think that each one of us is given these moments of serenity and it is only a precious few that actually realize that they have experienced them. And even fewer still that actually give thanks for having received such a gift.

I had this moment last week. I was visiting my children and grand son in Atlanta for the week. Each day of my stay, I tackled a new adventure or dealt with some issue in each of their lives -- be it a fun excursion to the mall, shopping for material, toasting raises/promotions, or moving furniture. By the time Friday arrived and we were preparing for a surprise party for my daughter, I felt as if I had enjoyed all that I could. I was thanking God for all the happiness of the week, and yet I had one remaining issue that kept my focus. One of my children was still facing challenges that I could not fix. I was aching to "make it right" and take away the anxiety that was his and yet it was beyond my control. My son was was facing an interview after a very long and stressful job search. I sat in a chair during the time that he was interviewing and prayed that he would be successful. I asked for just one more wonderful miracle for my son who so needed to have a moment of triumph.

And my prayers were answered. He was not only successful, but triumphant! He was offered a position and accepted.

At that moment, all the pain, worry, upset, and heartache of the past four months dissolved. My tears were spontaneous and my joy boundless. I had achieved that serenity that we all seek and with many thanks and celebration, I have appreciated this dear and precious gift.

My cup runneth over. Life is Good.