I need to say I love you more

Yesterday I received a telephone call from a dear friend of mine. It was his birthday and he was thanking me for a gift I had sent. I told him that I hoped his day was perfect in every way and his response so warmed my heart that I felt the need to write about it. He said, "I am walking on the beach with the love of my life (his wife who is my dearest friend) and the ocean waves are lapping at my feet. I am a lucky, lucky man!" What a remarkable thing to say. It might appear ordinary at first blush, but upon further thought, it is the most basic and the most incredible emotion to share.

I have always appreciated this person for his candor and his grand appreciation of life. He is a most successful person in all aspects of his life. Financially, there is no second. Personally, he is married to a remarkable person and they have an amazing family of successful boys, all of whom are happily married and now expecting children. He gives opportunities to his friend's children; he helps his friends, colleagues, the community, and church. His response to anyone who might question his giving or generousity -- "I am so blessed to have this and aren't I lucky to be able to share." He never wants to take credit for his accomplishments and doesn't look to be appreciated for his gifts. He merely acknowledges his blessings and appreciates his ability to give. He also says -- "isn't that better than the alternative?"

I aspire to be more like him in my day to day. I so hope that I remember to tell the people that I love that they are the most important people in my life. I try to start each day with an "I love you" and a hug or a kiss or a smile. I want to be able to impart the depth of my feeling at every turn. But human I am and imperfect I remain. Maybe with more examples of this behavior, as I witnessed yesterday in a casual telephone call, I can remember that it is what we do when we are with someone that matters -- not how much we meant to say when they are gone. I have always been of the opinion that it matters most that we give while we are living and very little about how much we impart at ones funeral. The biggest criers at most funerals are those who have the most regrets-- not having said all that they could, not sharing their love quite enough, having sadness over arguments unresolved and hurt feelings not mended. I hope that this is a moment for me that has been a grand reminder of what is important.

For me, the most important thing in my life is my family. My husband and I have built a solid foundation for an amazing group of individuals. I adore my husband and never tell him quite enough that I love him without reservation, care for him in unmeasurable ways. He is the rock upon which I build all my dreams and I love the life we have made together. In its imperfections, it is beautiful and I have no regrets.

My children are the four chambers of my heart and without them I would surely perish. Each one is so amazing and as a team they are unstoppable. I have enjoyed watching them grow and evolve as individuals. Each one is uniquely talented. They are each brilliant. The beauty that each one exudes in their day to day is utterly magnificant. I am so blessed to have them and I learn from them always. They have become the teachers and I the willing student. I so appreciate their insight and their "take on the world" and I try to incorporate their openness into my own "strict set of parameters" as I realize more and more that the more I know, the less I know.

I adore my son in law as he has brought a new dimension to our family. His perspective has shaped the way we all think on certain levels and I appreciate his ability to assimilate and become "one" in the somewhat daunting circle of our family. His laughter has made us all "lighten up" at times and made us look at ourselves with a more candid eye! What a blessing it is to have him.

And the most incredible addition to our family is our precious grandson. He is the glue that holds us all together -- and to think that only two years ago we didn't even know him. I have the most amazing love affair with my grandson -- I fell for him upon first sight and I have not been the same since that moment. He is the beauty and innocence of life. A magic moment in every day. When he laughs the clock stops and I have memorized the tones -- I will always see him as this amazing ball of love and beauty. As my husband and I have said -- "he is the best thing that we ever did."

Who would have thought that when my husband and I fell in love - 37 years ago -- that we would be at this point? We could not have imagined that our combined genes could create such beauty and perfection. I think back to those days and remember our dreams. We always wanted a large family and predicted that we would be millionaires and greatly successful people! I think that we imagined that we could do all this without any speed bumps are road blocks! How naive we were -- and yet -- here we are today with all that we could have wished -- and more!

I end this with one phrase: "I love my family, friends, and my life. I am lucky to have lived and have loved and I have no regrets." Now I need to share this with all I see. I need to say this more.